RED January: Training For Fondo Bambino

Back in my post titled Something In The Planning, I mentioned I was planning on a challenge for January.  None of this New Years resolution stuff, just a challenge to get my backside off the sofa and into the saddle.

I’ve been busy lately looking into the different workouts in Zwift, that indoor training app that I’m loving at the moment.  Zwift is going to help me achieve this challenge, whether I will be cycling around London, New York, Richmond, Innsbruck or Watopia.  Regardless of where my avatar is, I will be riding every day with the target of at least 10 miles each day in my sights.

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Missed A Group And Paid The Price

It’s not easy trying to change something about yourself.  Especially when you’re trying to change years of bad habits and bad food.  It’s even harder if you put in place a support network of people and you miss a week at group.  This is what I did last week.  I wasn’t feeling up to going so I didn’t, the result was two bad weeks instead of one.

Food addiction is an actual thing and I suffer from it – big time.  I can go a few weeks being on plan with Slimming World and get some cracking losses each week, but then the cravings start.  This is the food addiction kicking in.  This started kicking in again last week.  What did I do about it? Nothing, abso-freaking-lutely nothing.

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Something In The Planning

It’s December now, which means Christmas has been around for the last 6 weeks.  As we have a 4-year-old who is really into Santa for the first time this year, our Christmas tree is now up, flashing and looking festive.  The outdoor lights are hung and the timer plugged in, and gifts are piling up in the spare room ready to be wrapped (and sent to Santa for delivery).

As we draw closer an closer to Christmas, we also get closer to the end of the year.  2018 has been a good year for me, a new addition to the family on the first day of the year, I’m the lightest I’ve been for more than a decade and I have a new hobby in cycling.

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Just Because You Can

I had a little bit of spare time the other day while on the computer.  So I decided to see what it would be like to create my own cycle jersey based from this here blog.  What I though wouldn’t be anything that would look good actually turned out not too bad.

Custom cycle jersey

On the front is the blog logo, the fat stick man in a cycling position with the wheels of a bike turned into some sort of F and S.

Each Arm has the URL running up to the shoulder.

On the back is the blog logo again, along with the blog URL across the top.  The three pockets on the back have the header for the blog’s Facebook page along with the words

fighting with myself taking on the war of being overweight

FatMan Slimming

I actually quite like how it turned out and would maybe have ordered one had the price been a little lower.

The site I created it in  They create bespoke sportswear for a large range of sports.  I simply found them by going to Google and searching for “custom bike jersey uk”.  There are plenty of companies that will do this, but Owayo had the best editor I could find.

Thank You Anxiety

I’ve never really known what anxiety really was until recent times.  It can be a real bitch too.  When talking about anxiety in general, you will hear things like feeling on edge about something, feeling of restlessness in situations you don’t like and feeling irritable.

Tonight Matthew, I’m going to be… all of the above.

Let me quickly set the scene.  Tonight was Christmas Fair night at my daughters’ school.  The first Christmas fair of what would be many as she spends the first 6 years or so of her schooling life there.  School is a busy enough place when all the kids are there learning.  Now factor in all those kids being there with their parents and grandparents.  Imagine just how many people are now crammed into the school.

I believe this is the first time I’ve really felt uncomfortable with such a large number of people in such a confined space.  All 4 of us were there tonight; Me, the wife, our daughter, and our 10-month-old son in his pushchair.  A pushchair in the environment we were in was not the best call – both I and the wife will say that, but he’s too heavy to carry around without getting back issues.

Most of the time there the wife followed our daughter around doing the different games, buying the different cakes and arts ‘n’ crafts.  I tried to avoid the masses of people trying to get from A to B in the tiniest of spaces.  I generally hung to one side with the pushchair.

It was in the main hall (the most open part of the school) that I very nearly just took the pushchair and left.  I could feel myself fighting any emotions that were trying to come out, really not wanting to break down or anything in front of all these people that I don’t know.  I just wanted the ground to open up and swallow me there and then.

A couple of minutes later (or what felt like much longer) the wife returned with our daughter and we eventually left.  I held it together while we walked back to the car, while I drove a quick errand to pick something up and until we got home.  As soon as we got home I needed something to do, so I went straight to tidying up.

The wife at this point knew something was off.  Then something happened which has never happened while I’ve felt like this, I told her what was wrong… kind of.  We just had a moment together and I explained that I just don’t think I can deal with large crowds – especially in confined spaces.

Granted having the pushchair did not help because you can’t really maneuver is anywhere and it really doesn’t help when people look gone out when you ask “excuse me please”.  It’s sometimes like you’re an inconvenience to them stood in the way not doing anything, rather than it actually be them who are the inconvenience.

What I need now is something to keep my mind busy.  Thus me straight into the tidying at home and now writing about my ordeal to all you wonderful readers.  I’m now a lot calmer than I was earlier, so thank you for your time and for letting me ‘get this off my chest’ if you’ve got this far.

Recipe: Mega BLT

I love a good sandwich and you can’t get a sandwich must better than a BLT (Bacon, Lettuce and Tomato).  A BLT sandwich is typically better in the summer when Tomatoes are at their best, but there is something about the saltiness of the Bacon mixed with the crisp, cool texture of the Lettuce and Tomato.

The BLT with a side of Lettuce and Tomato
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